Things that didn't become excrutiatingly painful until after one fractures their tailbone:

1. Sneezing and laughing (crying, however, is pain free!)
2. Pants. Or tight skirts. Or anything that is not flowing away from the butt. Pressure, much?
3. Kneeling/bending. And of course, there is also that terrible luck that you drop EVERYTHING that graces your fingertips.
4. Standing. On the plus side, my feet no longer hurt at work! Guess my body just couldn't handle TWO places hurting. Oh and walking sucks too.
5. Lifting heavy objects
6. I'm sure there's more, but I've been trying to block them out.

Things that don't cause excruciating pain.

1. Laying on my side.

So guess what I've been doing for a large part of the past week and a half?
Yup.

The underlying thesis of a fractured tailbone is this: It hurts, and there's really nothing you can do about it. You can pop painkillers, and they may work depending on your luck and the amount of narcotic contained in them, but that's really your only chance. You can get a special pillow (in my case a travel pillow from my job, though I'm considering upgrading to a toilet seat) but it isn't a cure-all. It'll still hurt, and it'll usually become worse right when you think it's gotten better. And it's that awful, hard to pinpoint pain that's like a sore bruise, only on the inside, not out. And it comes and goes in ebbs, so when you've spent eight hours on your feet and feel fine and have hope that maybe it's starting to get better you get slammed with an unbelievable amount of soreness that makes it hard to consider trying to get out of bet even though you're starving.

And speaking of starving, I am now scared to eat because I really can't exercise. And I'm really pissed because I was just starting to get jazzed about biking to school and gradually easing myself into running and all this crap, and now I can't do much of anything, and won't be able to for WEEKS. Ugh.

I also want to add that tailbones are one of the lamest vestige body parts ever.